Thursday, June 7, 2012


This post is going to be more personal than usual, but this is what is on my mind (a lot lately).
At the end of April, I challenged myself to a health and fitness challenge.  Here I am a little over a month later, 7 lbs lighter, more toned and I lost 1/2 inch in both my waist and hips measurements! I am super pleased with my results thus far and have been further inspired to continue with the physical challenge, but would like to move inward a bit.
Within this last year there have been so many changes in my life.  I got married, moved to LA, and had visions of what my life would be like up here.  Well, I am just going to say it.  I have been struggling with an identity crisis.  Not easy to admit (especially on the internet) but it is honest.  Growing up I have always had many different interests and things I enjoy doing, but I knew I was going to be a teacher.  When I was 18-20, I continued going to school full-time, worked part-time and pursued modeling for a bit.  When faced with a choice to sign with an agency (they asked me for full availability in which I would not be able to be a full-
time student) or continue in school, I chose school.  After all, I was taught that a college degree was incredibly important and no matter what I wanted to do after, if I had a degree I would be set.  This was 2004, pre-recession.  Here I am now in 2012, almost 27 years old, with both a BA in History and a CA Teaching Credential, serving at a restaurant with very little knowledge of job skills other than food and beverage, hospitality or teaching.  Modeling is something I would like to pursue again as I feel like I never really took the chance before, but I am older, curvier and in a shrinking market.  I have applied at over 100 different schools in LA/OC area and have only gotten 3 interviews total, and have not been hired.
Last week I got "let go" of one of my jobs for the first time in my life--I have always taken pride in my work and have never been written up or got a bad review, but I was fired for a reason I was not made aware of (this was actually a blessing in disguise as this job was giving me anxiety and I got very sick twice within my month employment there).  It is so easy to get discouraged by circumstances.  I have no idea what I am supposed to be doing right now.  On Saturday my husband and I are going to Boston and NY for a week (a long overdue but much anticipated vacation).  My challenge to myself is not to over think my life and lack of career but to enjoy these incredible cities and all they have to offer with our friends.   When I come back, I know these issues will still be here, but sometimes a change of perspective is required to produce results.

Pictures via Pinterest


  1. Oh, Alisia my heart goes out to you right now. I know what you're going through all too well. Time away from home will be good for you. Sometimes a change in scenery does help to give a new perspective. Yes, you'll have to deal with it when you return home, but ENJOY your time away.


    1. Thank you Chris for you encouraging words, I am hoping it helps. =)

  2. I feel you, I've been going through a very similar process! I broke down to my husband the other day saying I just felt so unqualified for anything and I lacked both experience and education in about every department because I am a Psychology major. I do think everything in our lives happen for a reason though and I'm trying to think that maybe if I had choice other routes in my life there are valuable things I would have missed, such as meeting my husband. Keep your chin up, I just know everything will get better-- maybe not right away but soon :)

    1. I agree with you! I am where I am in life for a reason, and I completely know how you feel. I guess at times like these, it is important to remember what you do have and are thankful for, as opposed to everything that is lacking at the moment. I hope it gets better for us both soon! =)

  3. I hope things start to work out soon! Honestly I feel like I know what you are going through. My life is nothing like what I thought it would be...I guess I always thought I would be more accomplished by now. For now I'm just trying to take it day by day and working on moving forward with life.

    xo erica


I read every single comment! Thanks for sharing. =)
xx, alisia e